Surviving Renovation and Staying Together: 4 Rules


When two people decide to make their apartment a cozy family nest — hang the wallpaper, paint the ceiling, change the flooring and acquire new furniture, they readily take on renovations, anticipating a great result. And some even think that the joint ennobling of a common home brings them closer together, and the process itself resembles shots from romantic films in which a girl smears her lover’s nose with paint, both laugh and then eat sandwiches while sitting on the floor in the room. But the reality, unfortunately, is far from the cinema. And most couples who have started repairs quarrel with each other so much that sometimes it comes to parting.

Most often, conflicts arise from a mismatch of views, perceptions, and expectations. Do you dream of a vintage interior in light colors, and your Russian brides at Ladadate prefer high-tech glass and metal shine? Why not a reason for a quarrel? But it can also be avoided.

1. Agree in Advance

Before proceeding with the repair, discuss with your beloved one all the nuances of the upcoming alteration:

  • room design,
  • furniture,
  • price category of building materials, etc.

It is better to discuss in advance who will be responsible for decorating the walls in the living room, and who will choose furniture for the kitchen. If during the discussion you understand that in some way your views do not match, then suggest that everyone takes responsibility for a specific field of activity, based on your knowledge and skills.

For instance, you are responsible for the work of the craftsmen whom you hire to install the tiles and replace the flooring, and your significant other is closely involved in the combination of colors and the selection of lighting.

2. Follow the Plan

When the preferences are voiced, and the action plan for the upcoming renovation is ready, follow it clearly. Agree, it will be extremely unpleasant for you if your chosen one suddenly starts giving orders where, according to a preliminary agreement, only you decide everything. Of course, in the course of the action, you will understand where it is worth making some adjustments and giving your beloved one a little advice, but in no case present it in an edifying form or the form of a claim.


3. Take on the Rough Work

The best way to avoid quarrels during repairs for a man is to undertake what he is definitely stronger in, namely the so-called rough work:

  • choosing building materials,
  • finding and monitoring the work of craftsmen,
  • replacing the plumbing system, etc.

4. Remember That Repair Will Finish

Sooner or later, all this destruction will turn into a comfortable apartment of your dreams, but a relationship that has been severely tested in the form of quarrels, scandals, and tantrums may never recover. Always remember that the renovation will be over. And is it worth wasting your nerves on something that will not seem so crucial in six months, when you suddenly want to make a new renovation? Therefore, always make compromises, calmly argue your position and respect the point of view of your partner. After all, they will also live in this apartment, like you.

The views expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of The World Financial Review.